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Prevent Your Child From Losing his Life to the Video Game

Domenick J. Maglio, Ph.D. Neo-Traditionalist

There have always been activities in which children lose themselves in fantasy. For many generations reading, radio, movies and television offered children an escape from daily life. “I have a few more pages to finish this chapter in Harry Potter.” “There is only 5 minutes before my favorite television show ends.” These rationalizations are used to avoid doing more productive and tedious activities in a youngster’s life.

The newest diversion “virtual reality” video games is a much more powerfully addictive form of amusement than anything people have been exposed to in the past. It manipulates all of our senses while using a sophisticated though subtle reward system to motivate individuals to return to this fantasy world that they think they are creating. In the world of gaming children say about others who are overly involved that they have “lost their lives to the game.”

Some children even pay others to buy virtual things to advance their level in the game. Some wealthier individuals are even outsourcing their participation. These people pay others to play their game while they reluctantly meet other obligations in order not to lose their competitive edge.

Compulsive “gaming” is creating serious problems for children as young as 6 and as old as 35 or older. Children are coming to school in a zombie-like state from gaming until early in the morning often 8-14 hours in a row. Their homework, eating and even bathing deteriorates. They become obsessed with reaching the next level in the games such as Warcraft or Ruinscape. Online co players create an artificial dependency that substitutes for face-to-face personal relations and leaves the individual little opportunity to develop emotional and social skills.

Video gaming is an exploding problem among American youth. According to most surveys, 90% of children participate in some form of video gaming. There is little doubt many people’s daily lives are out of whack from their deep allegiance to these games. The American Medical Association has gone so far as to seriously consider excessive video gaming as a psychiatric illness. “AMA Hits Pause on Video Game addiction Diagnosis”, Tampa Tribune, Thursday, June 28, 2007, pg .5.

Excessive gaming is not a psychiatric illness. It is an addiction. It is no more a mental disorder than compulsively playing paintball, skateboarding, surfing or shopping. Excessive involvement in any activity will result in physical and mental imbalance.

Before a child can reach this stage of addiction there are many obvious signs. He becomes reluctant to follow directions, be respectful, do chores or homework. When any of these behaviors are attempted, they are done without enthusiasm. Outdoor play time drops off as the child begins to play on the computer on weekends as well as during week days.

Parents usually intuitively know when their child is too absorbed in the video game world. Parents uncertainty is clarified by asking teachers and others how much time a child should spend on the computer. Most parents cannot help but be aware that gaming is potentially a serious problem for their child. It is the responsibility of parents not the government’s to establish a healthy environment for their child to develop.

The freedom of all families should not be abridged for lax child rearing of some lazy parents. We do not need the government mental health establishments intruding into our families. The psychiatric industry has no place labeling the child to avoid confronting lazy parents not doing their job. When children are young their parents are ultimately responsible for influencing the children’s choices. Parents can use a subtle or a more direct approach in guiding their children towards positive behaviors.

Parents need to be the parents not just non-judgmental wimps. When parents do not agree with their children’s behavior, they need to step in to moderate or stop it. Children are too inexperienced to possess the wisdom to stop playing computer games on their own, that’s why they have parents.

The conventional wisdom is a child should spend no longer than two hours a day in front of any electronic screen. If a child is well rounded, he will not have any time nor desire to devote to an artificial life when he has a real one. It is the parent’s privilege and responsibility to establish a healthy routine for the child to learn a host of values, skills and abilities. By structuring your child’s family time, chores, homework and outdoor physical play you will prevent your child from losing his formative years in the fog of fantasy.